here and now;

i think elendrus and i have both reached the conclusion that we are for each other, and that no matter how badly we quarrel/fight, in the end, we will still be with each other;

so on this note, i shld remember not to overreact/get too emo anymore, cos everything will be okay in the end.

the thing is, when we are actually fighting, i sometimes feel like this time has gotten too bad to salvage, and then when we patch up, i look back at how heartbroken i got/how much i cried/how i couldn't sleep and feel like the whole thing has been really lame-.-

and i need to remind myself to not take our daily happenings for granted, cos honestly every single day, when i go sit down and think about it carefully, we both really enjoy each other's company, we laugh alot, tease each other, get playful, savour meals together, indulge in many hugs and kisses..

i feel really loved.

face it.

so many tempting products i wanna get!

there's ole henriksen's truth serum thing and philosophy's when hope is not enough.

both sound good and the reviews are awesome.

wanna try out urban decay's razor sharp ultra definition powder too.

or should i get benefit's hello flawless?

so many choices,

so little $$:(

gonna see the other car tomorrow(:

sigh dad was talking to me about getting a new car today, sounds tempting, depreciation at 2k more per year as compared to if i buy a second hand..and 2k over 12 months is...honestly not alot. and you get a BRAND NEW car with 5 years of warranty. sigh dunno what to do now.

had lunch at brewerkz today and i had fun. remember how i used to go there when i was small with my family but haven't been there in a loonnggg time! but i don't drink beer-.- so abit wasted haha

okay i really need to get back to studying...

if only i was strong enough to walk away from all this, without ever looking back..

funny how i was treated so much better before, which reminds me of that story about the boy picking the corn in the corn field.

so there was this boy who wanted to pick a big fat juicy corn. so his dad said, to walk along the cornfields and you can only pick ONE, and the catch was that you could never turn back.

so he started and saw alot of small corn, and decided there would be bigger ones if he walked on since the cornfield was so huge, and he was right, they seemed to get bigger the further he walked, more or less. and then he saw this pretty huge corn and was super damn tempted to pick it, but being greedy he decided that he would walk on cos there might be a bigger one. In the end, he ended up with a small corn cos of his greedy mindset. 

we should learn to be satisfied with what we have. and not be greedy and think that moving on will get us something better. it might, but it also might NOT. and then it's too late because you can never turn back..

but if you're at rock bottom then i guess you should move on..

bleeding love;

my eyes and my head hurt so much from crying
i'm like a tap
why am i so pathetic?
why can't i just be strong and walk away?

mbbs is less than 3 weeks away
i really need to focus
samantha, be strong;